a warning

“Ok, there are three things you need to know if you live with me”
He said breaking my serene silence on grandma’s
Musty patio cushions. Fuck. I brace.

1. I will be going for runs everyday
I nod

2. I play a lot of x-box
I shrug

3. I actually do shit.
I laugh

As he exhales the rest of his nerves
He waits for my reciprocation of this courtesy
I respond:

1. Good. Please. You’re getting fat.
“Aw, you should baby if it chills you out”

2. Shit, I forgot. I hate grand theft auto
“It’s ok-we’ll get two tvs”

3. Well aren’t we fucking perfect
“I shit too.”